EACH�WEEK��THE�INTREPID�JOURNALIST�BARES�HER�SOUL
OURNALIST�BARES�HER�SOUL
C O L U M N
DAWN PORTER shares…
It’s OK – she’s just
not that into me
here’s this girl I really like.
I invite her to everything
although she is rarely
T able to come, and when
we do make plans, it
isn’t uncommon for her to drop out last
minute. Which is weird, because when I
do see her, she tells me continuously how
her favourite thing in the world is hanging
out with her girlfriends (that’s me, by the
way) and sends me really sweet emails.
But that’s pretty much it. Emails.
Now. If she were a guy, I wouldn’t be
putting up with any of these shenanigans.
If she were a guy, I’d have taken the hint
and stopped bothering ages ago (after
lots of text analysis and ‘do you think he’s
playing hard to get?’ conversations with
friends, naturally). But she’s not a guy.
Which is why, despite her giving me
such blatant signs she doesn’t want to
be close to me, I’ve still been persisting.
Last week was her birthday. I was
really excited to see her and, even
though I was late, was one of the first to
arrive. Which was slightly awkward, to be
honest. I sat at the bar chatting to a guy
who was also there for her birthday
whose eyes kept disappearing over my
shoulder, clearly hoping to be ‘saved’
from me. Hardly surprising really, seeing
as my sense of misplacement was causing
me to talk about the weather and driving
penalties in California... Ugh! Honestly,
sometimes I wonder where my charm
goes when I am talking to strangers.
Anyway, she arrived 20 mins late with
a group of five girls, two of whom I know
very well and who apologised for being
late due to their dinner running over.
“Oh, you went for dinner?” I said.
I wasn’t invited. I suddenly felt even
more stupid for thinking we were closer
than we are. Still, I tried to be logical:
why would she invite me? No reason
really, other than I would have loved
to have gone.
����WWW�STYLIST�CO�UK
When she saw me, I braced
myself for a big I-haven’t-seen-youin-months
cuddle, but instead
I got a very quick ‘Hello you’
and then the pleasure of
watching her adore
everyone else.
Oh my God!
How had I got
this relationship
SO wrong!
I spent the next
few hours orbiting her
like the Moon until I
took a deep breath,
elbowed my way through
the crowd and started
a conversation.
“How are you? I’ve missed you,”
I said, to which she told me how
things were “just OK” in work
and love and nothing was really
happening. She then said: “Anyway,
I’m going to find you later” and skipped
off again, after which I watched her have
numerous ‘fun’ conversations with other
people, not once mentioning how dull
and “just OK” things were.
Wow, maybe that’s why she doesn’t
like hanging out with me? I bore her
to tears and bring out the bad stuff?
Maybe I should just have talked about
the weather…
“If she were a guy, I wouldn’t be putting
up with these shenanigans. But she’s not a
guy. Which is why I’ve been persisting”
I sat and wondered why our
friendship had never taken off and
talked myself out of being offended
– there was no point in that. To her,
I’m just an acquaintance, part of her
satellite group, not her inner-circle
birthday-dinner group. It was futile
trying to push my way in.
I left the party clinging onto my
dignity. Like many relationships with
men that have gone a similar way, I
needed to hold my head up high and
admit defeat. I didn’t do anything wrong,
nor had she: she’s just not that into me!
Here’s the
thing…
Bloody
Marys
– bloody
great.
I think
Bloody
Marys must
be the best drink ever.
Vodka, ice, lemon juice,
Tabasco, Worcester Sauce,
salt, pepper, celery salt
(the key ingredient)
and tomato juice (also
a key ingredient,
along with the
vodka, obviously).
They’re like
the drink
equivalent
of an
LBD:
they’re
great before
meals to
take your
edge off
hunger, great
as an afternoon
tipple with
friends and
GREAT for
a hangover
cure. Love ’em!
DOMINOES
ARE�BACK�
The game of the moment
is Dominoes. I bought my
boyfriend a
vintage set for
his birthday
and we are
playing it all
the time. I
used to play
it a lot with my
grandpa when
I was li�le and
have always
wanted to try
it again. Not at
all a disappointment, just
so much fun – and slightly
addictive. Especially
because I keep winning,
WOOO HOOO!!
PHOTOGRAPHS��COLIN�BELL��GETTY�IMAGES
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