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OPINION
DAWN PORTER shares…
What do you get a man
for his birthday? You!
ast week was my
boyfriend’s 30th birthday.
ARGH!!! Why are men
L so hard to buy for?
You can’t just buy them
‘stuff’ like you can for your girlfriends,
because men don’t do ‘stuff’. They
prefer to buy things they either really
need (like a new bottle opener or work
shoes), or things they’ve researched
in detail for months. Neither of which
make for an amazing gift.
Plus, my boyfriend and I haven’t
even celebrated our first anniversary
yet, so I had absolutely no idea how
far I should go. I didn’t want to ruin
myself financially, but I did want to
show him that I notice him and the
things that he likes, and I wanted him
to see that I can read him really well
and that I enjoy pleasing him. I also
wanted to impress him. So, no
pressure, then.
Also – selfish as this sounds – I
wanted to get him something that would
make him proud of his cool and clever
and funny girlfriend (that’s me by the
way). Because, selfless as we are
supposed to be about presents, half
the fun is the character statement a
clever gift makes about us, right? Not
to mention the amount of adoration it
gets us if we get it right.
Sooo… first purchase was a picnic
basket for the many trips we have
planned. The basket was perfect;
cute, fun, summery and really
romantic. Lovely.
Next up was a movie poster with
Maureen O’Sullivan on it. I had never
heard of Maureen O’Sullivan (Jane
in the Tarzan movies, apparently),
but she was raised in his hometown
in Ireland and he almost did a back
flip when he saw it in a shop a few
months ago. Great presents for sure,
but was it enough? I wasn’t certain
a picnic basket and a Tarzan poster
said ‘cool’. I needed something else…
Every Thursday night he goes to
a poker night. I thought maybe he
would like to have a poker night at our
house, so I bought him a poker table.
But then I thought… what if he likes
getting out of the house on Thursday
nights for a bit of ‘him time’? Will my
gift make him feel trapped? Oh God,
now I had to get ‘fun’ stuff to take the
intensity out of the poker table.
Fun, Dawn, think fun…
My kneejerk reaction to ‘fun’
was to buy him a dartboard, a set
of boules, a weird Fifties musical
instrument thing that I can’t explain
any better than that, some vintage
dominos, and Balderdash. WOO-
HOO! Who could feel claustrophobic
with that lot kicking around?
But now I needed to make him
laugh. Then it hit me… POTATOES!!
Him being Irish, a running joke in
our house is that he loves potatoes.
So I called a friend who bakes, and
asked her to make me a cake in the
shape of a potato. Brilliant! Done!
AHHHH! Not quite. How could
“Will my gift make him feel trapped?
Oh God, now I had to get ‘fun’ stuff to
take the intensity out of the poker table”
I possibly be the perfect girlfriend
if I didn’t get him something SEXY
too?? Not a problem. A quick
trip to Agent Provocateur for a
kinky set of undies sorted that
right out.
Finally, the big day came and
it was wonderful. He laughed,
he cried, he clapped his hands
and gave me a few joyous
winks before showering
me with praise.
He loved his gifts, but the
one that got the best reaction?
The sexy undies – like you
didn’t know. Hmmmm,
maybe boyfriends aren’t
so hard to buy for after all…
A NAPA VALLEY WINE
GROVE: MY KIND OF
HOLIDAY DESTINATION
Having
just spent
a lovely
relaxing
weekend in
wine country
Napa Valley, I found
the literature on the
bottle labels very
Here’s the
thing…
entertaining. The idea
is to inform us of the
flavour of the wine –
however, more often
than not the ‘description’
is just a list of
compliments. “Worthy of
Age”? “Bold”? “Playful”?
I mean, seriously, that
could be describing
sombebody’s pet dog!?!
SOCIAL�KISSING��
WHAT�TO�DO?
I never know whether to
kiss on one cheek or two.
I usually go for two and
hope for the best, but a
while ago a�er a business
meeting with someone
I had just met, I went for
two, he went for one and
we ended up kissing square
on the lips. Mortifying.
Personally, I think High
Fiving is the way forward.
WWW�STYLIST�CO�UK����
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