OUTS POKEN
I met a man not long ago,
he was kind and wonderful
and we were soon falling
into that special place
which requires you to spend a lot of
time together. Especially at bedtime.
Aw. But far too suddenly (as if we were
middle-aged parents who had been
married for yonks) we were all of
a sudden too tired, busy, rushed and
stressed to spend time together.
Getting up early for work, getting
home late from work, going away on
business or just worried and distracted
by work. Even when we did take time
out for ourselves, one of us was either
drinking excessively to relax or so
tense that intimate exchanges were
impossible. There were three of us in
this relationship; work was the Camilla
to our Charles ’n’ Di.
I don’t remember it being this way.
I used to go to gigs and not just to
ones where I had to interview people.
I used to go to classical concerts
and close my eyes
and disappear
into art for a
while. Sometimes
I’d bumble off
to galleries (or
my particular
favourite, the
Egyptian Room
at the British
Museum) for a bit
of escapism. I’ve never loved
the theatre, but I’m gutted I never
saw Jerusalem. But I’m so terribly
busy at work now, you know.
Stars often blame work for their
break-ups, but not us normal folks.
18 WWW.STYLIST.CO.UK
“IS IT REALLY WORK
THAT STOPS US
ENJOYING OUR LIVES?”
Kate Spicer wonders why she never gets the time to read a good book
– and suspects it might be down to the invention of the internet…
LOVE
We aren’t making enough money or
being given enough free dresses to
be thwarted in love by something as
deeply unromantic as the office.
Whether it’s true love or hobbies we
put on hold, we suffer from a working
culture that makes us so paranoid in
this economic climate that we feel the
REDHOOK, LONDON
SIXTEEN OF US HAD DINNER THERE FOR MY
BIRTHDAY AND IT TOTALLY TOOK THE STING OUT
OF TURNING 41. THE GIFT OF A CREAM CHIFFON
CHLOÉ BLOUSE HELPED TOO…
(89 TURNMILL ST, EC1; 020-7065 6800)
need to work all the time.
At least that’s what I thought when
I started to think about this piece.
The point of it seemed pretty clear.
I’m a workaholic, terribly busy, very
focused on my career and because
of that particularly contemporary
malaise, I am deprived of the chance
to enjoy sex, love and art and other
higher-minded things.
Then I stopped cleaning my
fingernails and making yet another
cup of tea. I got off YouTube, iTunes
and Facebook and realised I am not
COLUMN
HATE
”I MEAN I NEVER GET TO SEE
MY FRIENDS, MY BOYFRIEND…
THE HOURS ARE JUST SO LONG”
over-worked, it just looks that way
because I am constantly distracted.
I am desperately bad at focusing
on one thing: work. Instead I flutter
around doing several other things,
which take up huge amounts of time
that could otherwise be spent doing
proper paid work.
I have ADD, of sorts; a short
attention span that has been aided
and abetted by a non-stop stream
of distractions coming from my
phone and computer.
A few weeks ago I became so
CR*P ROSÉ
ROSÉ IS THE WINE OF SUNSHINEY TIMES AND
LONG HAPPY AFTERNOONS, YES, BUT WHEN ALL
A PLACE SERVES IS SOME RUBBISH THAT TASTES
LIKE STRAWBERRY JAM IT’S NEARLY AS BIG
A SUMMER BUMMER AS RAIN.
WELL-KNOWN WRITERS TELL
US THEIR THOUGHTS...
hideously behind with my work that
I left a message on my answerphone
saying I will not be taking any calls
today nor checking my emails. For
a week I just sat at my computer and
worked. My God, I got a lot done. And
I felt calmer than I have in years. In the
evening I went out, not to get drunk
to try and forget all the stuff I hadn’t
done. Instead I dedicated myself
to higher-minded, more enriching
distractions. One night I read an
entire book between 6pm and
midnight. People, we are not
overworked, we’re over-Tweeting.
It was a good week. But within a few
days my editor was on the phone
saying my message sounded pathetic.
Most of us are not illegal immigrant
slave labourers picking cockles, we
are generally able to get our work done
and leave the office having done a full
day’s work at 6pm. But we’ve grown
used to staying late and being
constantly available to our bosses;
it makes us feel important.
Back in the Nineties, I worked with
a female journalist who is now really
rather famous. She worked hard in the
day and left at 6pm. I remember
resenting her, but only because she
had the confidence to say, ‘I’ve done
my work now, I’m off.’ Meanwhile,
I was nurturing a long hours habit and
spending far too great a proportion
of my day sending funny emails.
If we work smart, we don’t need
to keep our BlackBerries on 24/7 and
toil long hours. A work/life balance
is within our reach. But the question
is: are we too
hooked on
working hard
and non-stop
chat to get
the balance
right…?”
Next week in Stylist:
writer Sali Hughes
PHOTOGRAPHY: GETTY IMAGES
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